In ancient Japanese culture, it is said that whenever someone gets too old, they would usually send them all up to a place in the mountains to spend the rest of their years there until death.
One day, a young man was sending his old mother up the mountain too to join the other old people up there. As he was climbing the mountain, he kept hearing sounds of broken sticks from his mother who was carried on his back.
Mother, what are you doing? The young man asked. Son, it's already night and very dark here too so I'm breaking little tree branches for you so you can easily trace them and easily find your way back home after you leave me there. The mother said.
Tears started to flow down from his eyes, because even though his mother was very old and weak, the young man realised that his mother still loved and cared very much for him.
He paused and stood for a while without moving. Then he decided that it made no sense to send his mother up the mountain to live there alone with no one to care for her. So he decided to take his mother back home so he can take care of her himself.
His brave decision led other young men to do same and with time, this ancient tradition was abolished.
How well does your mother or father, grandparents or any other old person you know mean to you?
We live in a super busy world today and often we do not take time to stop and think about our old folks. Some are sadly living alone in their homes and for some also, we pay huge amounts of money every month just so some nursing homes can take of them for us, instead of us doing it ourselves.
Our busy city life and work life does not give us a moment to realise that one day soon enough, we will end up just like they are now.
Feeling too weak to walk and too weak to do anything by ourselves. We will not be able to do a lot of things with much energy and strength when we get older.
So who are we now to judge them and say, oh they nag a lot, oh they talk too much, oh they have nothing important to do, just sit around, make noise and worry worry a lot.
If this is what you think your old mother or father, grandparents or other older aunties and uncles mean to you, then I'm sorry but you have a cold heart.
Both my parents are in their seventies (70's). My mother will call my phone several times in one night usually around 11pm just to ask kwame, how are you. I used to get really angry and pissed off because I believe she was always disturbing my beautiful sleep. Until one day, I had a change of heart when she called me from the hospital where she works. Talking about how scared they all are because of the Corona virus. And the number of innocent people she has seen dying.
I realised she usually calls me a lot because it helps her blow off some steam in her difficult work schedule.
Because surprisingly, she is a frontline worker too.
She needs to talk to me from time to time so she can enjoy the pleasure of being listened to by her own any of her children.
These days, it doesn't bother me at all like it uses to when she calls.
She continues to call me and all of us, sending pictures of some weddings she went to over the weekend. Or often times ask me how she can change her WhatsApp profile picture on her smartphone. (something I have taught her many times how to do).
She will talk and talk and ask me or any of my brothers (I'm sure) if her dress for a wedding or church service is appropriate.
Annoying and funny as it may seem sometimes, I have come to love and appreciate my mother the more. I have a different view and mindset now to everything in life.
Because what we see to be the nagging or irritating things they do, are actually the memories they will leave behind for us when they are gone.
So I see, think and treat them differently now.
Which is nothing but love, respect and much admiration for them.
What about you? What will it take to repair the broken relationships you have with your old folks?
Like the mother of the young Japanese man, my old boy and girl, together with my old aunties are always breaking down sticks through words of wisdom for me and my family to live a decent life.
A few hours before I wrote this, a friend said this to me after we had heard of the death of a famous actor here in Ghana.
"People will travel miles and miles to bury you at your funeral. But will not bother to cross the street to even to check up on you when you are alive"
Our old people deserve better. Don't you think??
Kwame Sarpong | Freelance Writer:
Nyansa365
e: nyansa365@gmail.com | w: nyansa365.blogspot.com
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f: Otumfour Kwame Sarpong
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L: Kwame Sarpong
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