Skip to main content

Know Your Limits


Are you a generous person who always genuinely want to help people?

Do you always want to go above and beyond yourself to help people just because you are a good or a kind person?

Or are you being kind or generous to people so as to receive praises and Cheers of approval from people?

Then this article is for you, so listen....

A lot of times we feel compelled  to help, support and be kind to people because we feel for them or because we can sometimes identify ourselves with their pain.

But often times, if you will and watch pretty well, we do so and leave our own goals and aspirations behind. Because we may think that oh, this person is really in a bad situation and he really needs help. I know I have got to start my business this year, but wait,  let me help this my friend or sister out with some money or some support. After he or she is physically or financially stable, I'll get back to building my business again.

Great idea, my dear sister and brother, but here's the thing maybe you haven't realised yet, how will you know for sure you can get back to building that business again or work on that personal goal again?

You will agree with me that there is no assurance or certainty to that. Right?

Do not ever shoot yourself in the foot by doing a good deed which may eventually throw you backwards in life or drag you deeper into a mess you may never recover from.
Back in the University,  I think on my last semester of my second year, being the kind person that I was, I decided to help my coursemates out with a French Conversation Exam. A few of us could really do the paper, but majority couldn't. On reading through the paper, I realised it was a pretty simple comprehension excercise. So I thought to myself, let me help my next person seated by me with answers to all the questions.
I wrote all the questions and provided the answers on an additional paper and passed it on to her to be passed on to everybody who was suffering too.
Here's the sad part, by the time, I handed the additional  paper to the person and started to work on mine, it was left with only 5 minutes to finish the exam. The lecturer shouted the time left and I was shaking like a leaf with fear. I wrote as much as I could. When the final results came, everyone thought I will have a 100% or 80% the least.

Including my French lecturer. He called out my name first, Kwame Sarpong. Smiling this moment, because I thought I had done very well as usual. But he said, you have really shocked me this time, you had 60% why??

Just to let you know, I'm very disappointed in you. I couldn't console myself because he said this Infront of everybody in the class. The people I had sacrificed so much time to help them past the test, became the same people who were laughing at me hard for being stupid and a fool.

This then became a hard lesson for me after college, that I will never help anybody so much or put whole of myself in their  affairs so much that I forget the important things I need to do for myself too.
The sad thing is some of the people you may sacrifice so much to help will not even remember or appreciate what you did for them years ago or things you are still doing for them.

These days, even though I still help a lot of people,  I have limits to how far I want to go with helping somebody. I push towards self sufficiency with the person even with my family members. I will help you get on your feet but you also have to push yourself to make something meaningful from what I'm giving you or doing for you. I will let you know, by one year, 6 months,by 5 days etc. I'm done based on a plan or strategy I will draw with you. I will invest and devote more of myself or invest any other needed support if you are doing great with the little help I'm offering you.  (Read the parable of the Talents from the Bible).

Life is what is happening right Infront of you, while you are busy making other plans and not paying attention to the present moment.

*Kwame Sarpong*
*Freelance Writer*

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The purpose of Hardwork or Sacrifice

Why do we work so hard or sacrifice so much for something?? What does hardwork or sacrifice mean to us?? What are we expecting to get in return from our hardwork or sacrifice?? Is it all worth it at the end?? We all have come to believe and understand for many years now that it pays to work hard. Many of us have different reasons why we work hard or sacrifice so much. For majority of us, we work hard every day so we can have a lot of money to do or get whatever we wish or desire for. But the real purpose of our hardwork should not be about money but should be focused on value and impact I believe. Think of these great people who have made their mark in the history of our world..... Jesus, Mohammed, Solomon, Mahatma Gandhi, Bill Gates,  Michael Jackson, Steve Jobs, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela, Barack Obama among a few. What did all these great men and many more like them have in common? Value and Impact. Not the desire to make money. They had a greater purp...
Post a Comment
Read more

USA And The Western World is Against Polygamy.. Our Ghana Law is Against LGBT Rights. Will They Allow To Set Up a Polygamy Office In Their Country??

On June 26 2015, the US supreme court struck down all state laws banning same - sex marriages and legalised in all the fifty states across America. I remember that day, pretty well watching CNN seeing then host taking the live feed Anderson Cooper in a jubilant mood. Pictures from the supreme court also painted the same picture. Men kissing men passionately, and women kissing women passionately and locking tongues as well. All this outside the US supreme court for the whole country and the whole world to see that the United States of America, the greatest free country on earth is now fully endorsing gay marriage and approving LGBT rights. The gay pride parade was insane, trust me. A few months later, some European Union countries also joined in and legalised it unanimously. I could recall on that evening I called up one of my Brazilian friends, a woman who had always been a strong advocate and a strong supporter of LGBT rights to pick her mind on what had just happened in the US. ...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Paradox of Our Times

*THE PARADOX OF OUR TIMES* Is that we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers Wider freeways and roads but smaller viewpoints We spend more, but we have less. We have bigger houses, but smaller families More conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees, but less sense More knowledge, but less judgement More experts, but more problems More medicines, but less healthy lives We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too little and hate too often We have learnt how to make a living, but not how to make a life. We have added years to life, but not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back But have trouble crossing the street to meet or greet the new neighbour. We have conquered outer space, but not our inner hearts We've cleaned up the air in our environment  but destroyed our souls. We claim to love all people but quick to show our prejudice We've higher incomes, but lower morals. We'v...
Post a Comment
Read more